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By Patricia McBee
he
great spiritual traditions suggest that the relationship
with God is cultivated like other relationships: as we turn
our attention toward God we open the possibility of a fuller relationship.
Entering into this relationship
does not so much require a change in our behavior as a shift of attention.
The suggestions below are offered as ways of supporting that shift
of attention.
The object is to open yourself more and more fully to awareness of the ocean of light and love as you go about the necessary activities of your daily life. Be gentle with yourself. Start in ways that are easy and attractive for you. After all, a shift of attention toward the ocean of light and love includes a loving compassion for yourself.
The ideas below are meant to be suggestive. Maybe none of them will speak to your condition, but they might point toward a practice that would be right for you. And it is an experimental process if you try something that is not fruitful or is not workable, gently turn back and consider what would support your desire for deeper relationship with the Divine. You don’t need to push. When you find an approach to spiritual retirement that is refreshing to you, time will open.
SHIFTING YOUR ATTENTION IN THE MIDST OF THE DAY’S ACTIVITIES
Some shifts of attention don’t require any special time at all:
- Walk more slowly (it has an amazingly calming effect).
- Say thank you more often—to your children, to sales clerks, to co-workers, to people cleaning the street.
- When you feel yourself getting tense, take a breath. Recite a line that reminds you of your spiritual retirement, e.g., “Guide me,” or “This moment is sacred.”
- When someone is annoying you, say a version of the Buddhist loving kindness meditation: “May s/he be free from suffering, may s/he be filled with loving kindness, may s/he be at peace.”
- When you see something of beauty (a flower, a sunset, an act of kindness) say a silent “thank you.”
- Smile more often.
IN THE SPACES OF YOUR DAY
There are many spaces in the day where one can practice shifts of attention. Choose one or two and experiment.
Spaces you might find:
- as you awaken and before you begin to move about;
- when you are brushing your teeth or in the shower;
- before eating;
- while waiting at a stoplight;
- while waiting for your computer to download or boot up;
- in an elevator;
- while waiting for an appointment;
- when you wash your hands or climb the stairs;
- as your head hits the pillow at night.
Things to do in those spaces:
- Make a mental list of three things for which you are grateful.
- Envision yourself floating on an ocean of light and love (or another image that brings you back to awareness of the presence of God).
- Take three deep breaths; with each inbreath feel love and safety entering you; with each outbreath feel tension leave you.
- Say the Jesus Prayer or the Prayer of St. Francis, or the Loving Kindness Meditation (see below).
- Invite God’s presence with words such as “Help me open to you,” or “Be with me now,” or “Show me the beauty in this situation.”
- Inwardly sing a line from a hymn or song that helps bring you back to center; e.g., “To turn, turn will be my delight, till by turning, turning I come round right”; or “Melt me, mold me, fill me, use me.”
SETTING ASIDE SMALL COMMITMENTS OF TIME
Experiment with setting aside 5 to 15 minutes every day or even 2–3 times a week for a practice that will help you shift your attention:
- upon first rising in the morning while sitting in your bed or at a window with a nice view;
- when the rest of the household has left for the day;
- sitting in your car before driving off;
- on your lunch hour: at your desk, sitting in a park, going into a nearby church;
- the first five minutes on arriving home;
- after dinner before undertaking the evening’s chores or recreations;
- just before bed.
Things to do in a small commitment of time:
- just sit;
- begin with one of the brief practices listed above and then settle into quiet;
- do a brief reading from a devotional book of your choosing;
- pay attention to your breathing and let its rhythms bring you to a quiet place;
- pray in a style that is meaningful to you.
COMMITTING LARGER BLOCKS OF TIME:
If you can find space in your day or week for one or more extended periods of retirement (30 to 60 minutes):
- carry a small book of readings with you that you can pull out when you are waiting for something or when time unexpectedly opens up;
- have a tape or CD of meditative music or of a meditative reading in your car or have a personal headset to listen to on the bus or as you walk the dog or when you’re jogging;
- get up 15 minutes earlier;
- examine your day/week for an activity you can lay aside for a month or two;
- replace one TV program a week with practice of spiritual retirement;
- replace one magazine you read with devotional reading;
- take a time that is usually spent with a friend or family member and do a spiritual practice together.
If you are committing these longer periods to Sabbath practices, please refer to Listening Spirituality: Volume I, Personal Spiritual Practices among Friends. Friend Patricia Loring presents a wide range of practices that expand one’s capacity to listen for the divine presence in one’s life in a much more thorough fashion than can be done here, including:
- reading;
- journaling;
- walking in nature;
- praying;
- meditating;
- movement;
- combinations of these
practices.
PRAYERS
Prayer of St. Francis
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;
Where there is hatred let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
Where there is sadness, joy.
Master, grant that I may never seek so much to be consoled as
to console;
To be understood as to understand;
To be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
It
is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
Jesus Prayer
Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me a sinner.
Loving Kindness Meditation
(from Jack Kornfield, A Path with Heart)
Beginning with yourself:
May I be filled with loving kindness.
May I be well.
May I be peaceful and at ease.
May I be happy.Then widening out to a loved one:
May s/he be filled with loving kindness.
May s/he be well.
May s/he be peaceful and at ease.
May s/he be happy.Continuing on to others:
friends, community members, people everywhere, animals, the whole Earth. It is a particularly good way to hold in the light someone you find difficult, wishing that they, too, be filled with loving kindness and peace.
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This is a feature article from the
April 2003 issue of Friends Journal.


