{"id":3131643,"date":"2020-01-01T02:25:00","date_gmt":"2020-01-01T07:25:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.friendsjournal.org\/mwanaume-mwanamke-au-mzima\/"},"modified":"2020-01-01T02:25:00","modified_gmt":"2020-01-01T07:25:00","slug":"mwanaume-mwanamke-au-mzima","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.friendsjournal.org\/sw\/mwanaume-mwanamke-au-mzima\/","title":{"rendered":"Mwanaume, Mwanamke, au Mzima?"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"<\/a>
{%CAPTION%}<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

 <\/p>\n

M<\/span> y hisia ya mimi kama mwanamke kuzeeka ni kwamba mimi inazidi androgynous. Natumai hivyo, kwani hii ndiyo hali ninayotaka kufikia mwisho wa maisha yangu. <\/span><\/p>\n

Simaanishi kwamba ninavaa kwa njia isiyoeleweka ili watu wasijue kwa uhakika ikiwa mimi ni mwanamke au mwanaume. Simaanishi kwamba mimi ni hermaphrodite au msagaji. Simaanishi kuwa nina jinsia mbili au pansexual, yaani, nimevutia kibayolojia maisha yangu yote kwa jinsia zote (zote). Ninamaanisha kuwa kwa miaka mingi nimekuwa na mwelekeo na fursa ya kukuza sifa za kiume za utu wangu kwa lengo la fahamu la kuwa mtu huru na aliyejumuishwa, kwa ujumla. <\/span>
\n mtu<\/span>
\n<\/i> .<\/span><\/p>\n

Baada ya maisha ya mapenzi mbalimbali na yenye shauku, niliweka nadhiri ya useja nikiwa na umri wa miaka 53. Labda niliweza kufanya hivyo kwa sababu kufikia wakati huo nilikuwa nimekuwa mtu mwenye usawaziko na mkamilifu zaidi, mtu wa androgyne. Carl Jung angesema kwamba anima na animus walikuwa wamekomaa ndani ya psyche yangu mwenyewe. Pamoja na kile kinachofikiriwa kuwa sifa za kike, mimi\u2014kama wanawake wengine wengi waliokombolewa siku hizi\u2014nina baadhi ya uwezo na hisia ambazo kawaida huhusishwa na wanaume: kupendezwa na idadi na fedha, kwa mfano. Nimesimamia mambo yangu ya kibiashara: kununua na kuuza magari na nyumba, kukopa na kukopesha pesa, kusimamia mali, kuishi na kusafiri peke yangu. Nimeanzisha miradi na kuendesha programu. Nadhani katika suala la mifumo na kuzungumza na wanaume kwa masharti yao wenyewe. Mara nyingi mimi huchukua nafasi za uongozi. Nililea watoto wangu peke yangu na nilistahimili magumu mengi. <\/span><\/p>\n

Kwa usawa, napenda kufikiria kwamba wanaume wengi wa umri wangu, katika miaka yao ya 70, pia wamepanua uwezo wao: kujifunza kupika, kushona, kupamba, kupanga karamu, kulea vijana, kutunza wazee na wagonjwa, na kuishi peke yao kwa njia ya kusisimua. Angalia kitu hicho cha mwisho; wanawake kwa ujumla ni bora kuishi peke yao kwa njia ya kusisimua. <\/span><\/p>\n

Ukweli uliotafitiwa kuhusu mabadiliko ya homoni katika maisha ya kati kwa wanaume na wanawake, ambayo huwafanya wafanane zaidi kadiri wanavyozeeka, yamenivutia kila mara. Mabadiliko ya homoni baada ya kukoma hedhi (pamoja na ”kukoma hedhi kwa wanaume”) yana athari kubwa kwa utu na vile vile kwenye mwili, wakati mwingine huwapa wanaume ufikiaji rahisi wa hisia zao na mielekeo yao ya upole, wakati mwingine kuruhusu wanawake kuwa wenye busara zaidi na ujasiri. Je, sisi sote tunakuwa watu wa jinsia moja? <\/span><\/p>\n

Au baadhi yetu tunakuwa watu wasiopenda ngono? Mabadiliko ya homoni ni jambo moja, lakini wengi wetu tumepata mabadiliko mabaya zaidi ya kisaikolojia kwani upasuaji ulitutenganisha na sehemu mbalimbali ambazo zilionekana kuwa muhimu kwa utambulisho wetu. Je, mimi ni mwanamke ikiwa nimepoteza uterasi yangu, matiti yote mawili, na hamu yangu ya kulala na mume wangu? Je, mimi ni mwanaume wa aina gani ikiwa nina saratani ya tezi dume au ninapambana na upungufu wa nguvu za kiume kwa sababu moja au nyingine? <\/span><\/p>\n

Maumivu haya yanafanywa kuwa mabaya zaidi kwetu katika miaka yetu ya uzee huko Amerika kwa sababu wengi wetu tulilelewa kufikiria kuwa utambulisho wetu wa kijinsia, labda hata utendaji wetu wa ngono, ndio ulikuwa jambo muhimu zaidi kutuhusu. Ikiwa tunapoteza uwezo au hamu yetu katika mahusiano ya ngono, tunajiona kuwa tumepata hasara kubwa. <\/span><\/p>\n

Tunaweza kuwa na wasiwasi kwamba tumekuwa watu wasio na ngono. Hili ni neno ambalo halikubaliwi kwa urahisi katika mazungumzo ya kawaida ya Wamarekani, ingawa kuna uwezekano kwamba baadhi ya asilimia 10 hadi 15 ya idadi ya watu hawajapendezwa na ngono kutoka kwa kwenda. Mara nyingi watu hawa bado wamefungwa. Labda kikundi cha LGBTQ kinapaswa kuongeza ”A,” au labda mbili, kwa kifupi chao, kwa androgynous na asexual: LGBTQAA. <\/span><\/p>\n

Kwa nini tusijifikirie sisi wenyewe badala yake kuwa tunasonga zaidi ya ufafanuzi wa kikomo wa jinsia na mwelekeo wa kijinsia na kuendelea kuelekea hali ya jumla (ya makusudi) ya androgyny? Iwe sisi ni mashoga au wanyoofu au wenye jinsia mbili, sisi wazee tumejidhihirisha kwa miongo kadhaa na utambulisho thabiti wa kiume au wa kike. Je, kungekuwa na matokeo\u2014labda hata kitulizo\u2014kuendelea zaidi ya hapo sasa? <\/span><\/p>\n

Wagiriki wa kale walidai kwamba kila mtu alitafuta mtu wa jinsia tofauti ili kukamilisha tabia yake mwenyewe. Wachina waliamini kwamba ilichukua uunganisho wa Yin na Yang kutengeneza nzima. Jung alionekana kuwa na wazo sawa la jumla. Labda sasa tunajifunza kwamba uwezo huo mbili, jumla nzima, unaweza kuwekwa ndani ya mtu mmoja. <\/span><\/p>\n

Labda wakati mwingine mwanamke mwenye umri wa miaka na uzoefu hahisi tena kwamba uke wake unahitaji kusawazishwa na uwepo wa karibu wa mtu mwenye nguvu katika maisha yake. Labda katika miaka yake ya kazi, alipata uwezo mwingi wa kiume ndani yake na anafurahi sana kuishi peke yake. Hajaachana na ngono, ni mzima tu. <\/span><\/p>\n

Labda mume mzee mwenye kufikiria na kufikiria hutambua kwamba yeye na mke wake wanaweza kufungua uhusiano mpya kabisa wa kimwili na wa kihisia-moyo ambao hawakupata kamwe kupata hapo awali.<\/span><\/p>\n

Labda baada ya ndoa ya muda mrefu, mjane mwenye nia ya wazi hupata kwamba ubinafsi wake mzima, sasa unashirikiana vizuri na mwanamke mwingine wa kujitegemea, na wa kike.<\/span><\/p>\n

Je, kuna ushuhuda wa Quaker ambao unajumuisha ubora wa kuwa mzima, usawa, na kuunganishwa ndani? Je, kuwa mkamilifu kama vile sisi wanadamu tunavyoweza kupata? <\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Je, kuna ushuhuda wa Quaker ambao unajumuisha ubora wa kuwa mzima?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5090,"featured_media":3082964,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9919],"tags":[18046,24745,12438,11262,13092,10914,10783,10930],"fpb_issue_category":[10263],"class_list":["post-3131643","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-tafakari","tag-carl-jung","tag-fernando-rodrigues","tag-lgbtq","tag-marekani-4","tag-matiti","tag-mtu","tag-quaker","tag-wanawake","fpb_issue_category-madawa-ya-kulevya"],"yoast_head":"\nMwanaume, Mwanamke, au Mzima? - Friends Journal<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.friendsjournal.org\/sw\/mwanaume-mwanamke-au-mzima\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"sw_KE\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Mwanaume, Mwanamke, au Mzima?\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Je, kuna ushuhuda wa Quaker ambao unajumuisha ubora wa kuwa mzima?\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.friendsjournal.org\/sw\/mwanaume-mwanamke-au-mzima\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Friends Journal\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/friendsjournal\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2020-01-01T07:25:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.friendsjournal.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/Reflection.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"779\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"438\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Friends Journal\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:title\" content=\"Mwanaume, Mwanamke, au Mzima?\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@friendsournal\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@friendsournal\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Friends Journal\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.friendsjournal.org\\\/sw\\\/mwanaume-mwanamke-au-mzima\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.friendsjournal.org\\\/sw\\\/mwanaume-mwanamke-au-mzima\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Friends Journal\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.friendsjournal.org\\\/sw\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/315ffb22a36ecbabdf5dbdc09d7d1eb7\"},\"headline\":\"Mwanaume, Mwanamke, au Mzima?\",\"datePublished\":\"2020-01-01T07:25:00+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.friendsjournal.org\\\/sw\\\/mwanaume-mwanamke-au-mzima\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":835,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.friendsjournal.org\\\/sw\\\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.friendsjournal.org\\\/sw\\\/mwanaume-mwanamke-au-mzima\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.friendsjournal.org\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2019\\\/12\\\/Reflection.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"Carl Jung\",\"Fernando Rodrigues\",\"LGBTQ\",\"Marekani\",\"matiti\",\"mtu\",\"Quaker\",\"wanawake\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Tafakari\"],\"inLanguage\":\"sw-KE\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/www.friendsjournal.org\\\/sw\\\/mwanaume-mwanamke-au-mzima\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.friendsjournal.org\\\/sw\\\/mwanaume-mwanamke-au-mzima\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.friendsjournal.org\\\/sw\\\/mwanaume-mwanamke-au-mzima\\\/\",\"name\":\"Mwanaume, Mwanamke, au Mzima? 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