Forum, September 2024

Finding opportunities to heal hurt feelings

I appreciated Michael Levi’s insightful article, “White Supremacy Culture in My Clerking” (FJ Aug.). I expect all yearly meetings in the United States need to consider this concern in the perpetual search for unity.

What it also brings to my mind is that there are other “identity” concerns, as critical as systemic racism will be until there is a massive cultural shift.

I have long been dismayed that anyone feels marginalized by race, age, gender, sexual orientation, theology, or ethnic heritage. Our young adults have been very vocal, sometimes threatening to leave us. Some older Friends have felt abandoned. Nontheists have felt ignored, and some traditional religionists have felt disdained. It seems like a problem among Friends more than in society at large. I expect that is because we provide opportunities for everyone to express themselves in our open processes, because we profess welcome to all, and because we attract people of great idealism. Those reasons arise from our Quaker values, yet they do nothing to resolve the problem.

I believe in my heart that Friends mean well but are found wanting because it is hard to walk in the shoes of another when the other may seem so different. The answer includes proactive efforts, not only in our committees, but as individuals. We may do much, but we always need to do more. I believe that all Friends need always to be prepared to do intense ad hoc outreach whenever the situation arises. Such opportunities abound in my experience. When a Friend expresses personal distress in a business meeting, does anyone reach out afterward for in-depth discernment? Are some Friends specifically expected to do so within our structure? If so, do we just assume it will be handled? Opportunities abound within and without our meetings, for all those who feel marginalized. We just need to discipline ourselves to rise lovingly to the occasion.

Jeffrey Aaron
Highland Park, N.J.

Re-centering Indigenous at center of colonial histories

Having just missed working with Dr. Jean R. Soderlund by months when I began working at the Peace Collection at Swarthmore College in 1988, I was unaware of her work as a historian of Indigenous people (“You Are Our Brothers,” FJ Aug.). I have since acquired and read Lenape Country: Delaware Valley Society Before William Penn, and look forward to acquiring and reading Separate Paths: Lenapes and Colonists in West New Jersey. I found her article in the August issue important and factual.

A few years ago I read a book review of John L. Ruth’s history from his Mennonite perspective, This Very Ground, This Crooked Affair, which connects the centuries-old history of the author’s Pennsylvania Mennonite homestead with that of the land’s Indigenous Lenape inhabitants, interweaving documented Pennsylvania history with the national pursuit of a doctrine of discovery—and the story of Mennonites who had themselves fled suffering and landlessness with the fates of Native Americans. In his book Ruth tells about William Penn, other colonists connected with Penn, and Mennonite immigrant settlers. He has placed the Lenapes of the Delaware Valley at the center rather than the margins of the story.

Kate O’Donnell
Vinalhaven, Maine

Refreshment and renewal through the earth’s beauty

I love the way that Melissa Breed-Parks has organized “Pathways to Nature, Pathways to Spirit” (FJ Aug.): senses, emotion, beauty, meaning, and compassion—especially compassion. I just read about a Harvard study that shows having fresh flowers in your house increases a sense of overall well-being! We so need your reminders for our spirit’s desire for refreshment and renewal through the beauty of the earth. Thank you.

Irene McHenry
Philadelphia, Pa.

Water, in water or in boats, brings senses, emotion, and beauty unless gasoline engines take it all away, including meaning and compassion. Human, solar-powered, boating connects us to the water we evolved with.

David N. Borton
Troy, N.Y.

Using games as laboratories for experimenting

Fascinating storytelling possibilities, particularly from a Quaker perspective of trying to role-play for minimal violence and maximum equality, while best dealing with selfish and difficult ogre personalities (“Session Zero” by Michael Huber, FJ Aug.). I am unfamiliar with session zero, but it sounds like a great concept to informally structure the game to include everyone’s views on fun storytelling. Dungeons & Dragons was great for developing real-world social skills, creative problem solving, and cooperation useful throughout life. Emphasizing morality and ethics struggles within the game could really help guide younger players to think carefully about complex issues.

George Gore
Chicago Area, Ill.

What an awesome article. I thankfully stumbled upon this right before my improv class, and I feel inspired about the ways I can show up to use creativity in my own world-building. Thanks for sharing!

Jackie Lamars
Pittsburgh, Pa.

This article has got me thinking. I’m imagining how Quaker D&D players might use the game as a laboratory for experimenting with how to live the peace testimony in a violent world. Rather than just giving them a world where animals are never harmed and there is no armed conflict, a talented game master could challenge the players to really think about how their pacifist characters would respond as, for instance, a town is being harassed by orc raiders or a war is brewing with the spider-worshiping dark elves of Underdark. It would take a very talented game master and players with a certain level of maturity, but one of the perpetual delights of D&D is the challenge of playing your character with authenticity, staying true to their values and goals (which may or may not match your own) as they engage with a world of epic possibilities.

Peter Bishop
Northampton, Mass.

Online: Michael Huber discusses his article in a video interview at Friendsjournal.org/michael-huber-interview.

Remembering those enslaved and harmed by Friends

As a “birthright” Friend of 63 years, I think it is important that these shortcomings in our experience of discernment come to light, but it is also valuable to remember the context (“339 Manumissions and Beyond Partners with Howard University” by Sharlee DiMenichi, FJ Apr. online; June-July print).

Discernment usually takes a long time. From the time that a small number of Quakers, following their consciences, risked their lives and livelihoods to participate in the Underground Railroad, our numbers grew slowly. We can all be thankful that attitudes of racial equality, and respect for that of God in every person, have begun to replace the hegemonic ideologies of the past.

Mark Metzler
San Jose, Calif.

There are two big moments in history when Quakers did bad things to groups of enslaved or dominated people. The first covers Black slaves. The second was Indian residential schools when Native American parents were forced to allow their children to stay in boarding schools often far away from home. They were places where cultural genocide took place.

A few years ago I contacted Lakota researchers in South Dakota, many of whom had living relatives who suffered a White regime in such schools; a form of intergenerational trauma still persists. They sent me the names of 50 children who had died while at school, many buried without marked graves. I wept. Rapid City Indian School later became a hospital for illnesses such as tuberculosis. The Lakota have raised funds to build a memorial walk to remember the children, with markers of their graves and places to pray in Rapid City.

David Horace Dobson
Cambridge, UK

I think it is important to consider the colonial attitude of Friends’ missionaries. In some instances this may have led to denial or at least delaying of self-determination and leadership by the Indigenous/Native people.

Tom Smith
Lino Lakes, Minn.

Memories of an old meetinghouse

It gave me great pleasure to read Cheryl Weaver’s article about attending meeting at the Orchard Park Meetinghouse and to learn that meeting for worship is again being held there regularly (“Silent Steadfastness,” FJ Aug.). I’m glad that the building and grounds are being kept up. And, yes, it was used by the Underground Railroad; it was originally built that large because the community needed a large space for speakers such as Frederick Douglass as well as spaces that could be used by the Underground Railroad.

Mary Alice Harvey
Duluth, Minn.